white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
