my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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