apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
