she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
