I'm sorry my penis didn't work
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
