He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
