Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
