Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now

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(517): View more from Michigan

They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

she kept yelling 'call me bella'

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(434): View more from Virginia

just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!

(1-434): View more from Virginia

why is this not a picture message?!?!

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(248): View more from Michigan

I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time

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(530): View more from California

Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.

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(727): View more from Florida

Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.

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(307): View more from Wyoming

In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.

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