Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
