I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I can't put those talents on a resume
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Randomize
