who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
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