omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Randomize
