I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
