Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
