Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
