I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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