I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize