You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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