He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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