Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
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