He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
