do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Randomize
