11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
