dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
