they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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