I wannas sexs uuuuu
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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