Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
