Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize