No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
