Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
