Duck Duck Cougar?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize