Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
