She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
