question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
do nipples grow back?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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