the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
