Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
