i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize