I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
this hospital has no fireball
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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