sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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