i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
