How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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