Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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