my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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