btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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