I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
