In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
