i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize