remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
