Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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