But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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