Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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