oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
