a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
